🛸
How to play Asteroid Bumper Cars
Bumper cars in zero-G. Last ship not in the sun wins.
How to play
Hold the pointer where you want to go and your thrusters push you toward it (WASD works too). There is no brake — you stop by thrusting the other way, or by hitting somebody.
The sun in the middle vaporises anything that touches it. It never moves; you do, usually faster than intended.
The blue safe ring shrinks all round. Drift fully outside it and you're gone, so the arena squeezes everyone sunward as the clock runs down.
Collisions are elastic and heavier ships win the exchange — but every bump briefly stalls both engines, so a reckless charge can leave you coasting into the corona alongside your victim.
Quick match, or make a room and share the 4-letter code. Rooms with fewer than three humans get bot ships to bully.
Scoring
- Last ship still flying takes the round, and every round win adds one to your leaderboard total — career wins, highest first.
- Taking the last spot from a bot wins the round but scores nothing. The board only counts rounds with a human in them.
Tips
- Momentum is the whole game: never thrust harder than you're willing to un-thrust. Half your deaths will be your own engine's work.
- Bump people on the sunward side. The stall after a collision is fatal for whoever's drifting toward the star, and elastic physics doesn't care whose idea it was.
- Early round, orbit the edge of the ring and let the impatient eliminate each other. The shrinking ring will force the fight soon enough.
Frequently asked questions
How do I stop?
You don't, really — you thrust the opposite way and hope. This is the game's central joke and its entire skill ceiling.
Is bigger better in a collision?
Heavier ships win exchanges, but both engines stall on every hit. Winning the shove and losing the drift is the classic way out of this arena.